Is "Winning" the Most Important Thing?

Those who know me know I am a competitive person. I like to win. It doesn't matter if I'm playing ping pong on the patio, cards in the kitchen, softball at the park or my "team" is playing on the football field or any other sport. I like to win and I like to be around winners. Sometimes my competitive nature takes over and I make a fool of myself. Thankfully those occasions have become less frequent as I have aged! But the point is I like to win. I think you should always play within the rules, respect your opponent but you should do what you can to win. When my kids were growing up I very seldom if ever "let them win." I wanted them to work for it and earn the win so they would feel good about themselves and what they had accomplished.

Having said all of that I was not really surprised but a little saddened when I read two articles in Sports Illustrated last week. I just recently subscribed to Sports Illustrated once again. For 25 years I have been a Newsweek subscriber, but last month I canceled that subscription and used my refund for a year of SI! Not sure what that will do for me, but it's already given me a blog idea so it must have been a good choice. Back to the stories. One was about Michael Vick and the other about Rick Pitino. As you know Michael Vick spent time in prison for dog fighting, was recently released and now is playing for the Philadelphia Eagles, who by the way I cannot stand! Rick Pitino is the head basketball coach of the Louisville Cardinals who had a sexual encounter with a woman in a restaurant a few years ago. She became pregnant with his child (she says) and he gave her $3000 for medical insurance with which she says she had an abortion.

Both articles detail the pasts of these two men and both went on to say that their past "indiscretions" should have no bearing on their roles as player and coach. The articles said as long as they WIN it doesn't matter what they do outside of their respective athletic endeavors. One fan was quoted as saying the first time Michael Vick scores a touchdown in an Eagles' game all will be forgiven. Another fan said that if Louisville beats Kentucky this year no one cares what Rick Pitino does in his personal time.

From someone who is an competitive as anyone you will ever encounter I say those articles are WRONG! It does matter what people do in all areas of their lives. Both of those men are role models to the young athletes and coaches or our country. Winning is important but it's not the most important thing. Who wins the Super Bowl and the NCAA Basketball Championship this year will soon be a distant memory but Rick Pitino's wife and kids will have to live with his "indiscretion" the rest of their lives.

Winning is fun and winning is important but how we lead our kids to live their lives is much more important. Let me know if you agree or not.

Sweet Sixteen

The day finally arrived last Monday, June 29, 2009. Alyssa, my youngest child and only daughter, turned 16 years of age. We celebrated all week long. We went to dinner on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and lunch on Saturday all to celebrate her birthday. She left for Jamaica on Sunday morning or I'm sure we would still be celebrating this week.

In some ways I couldn't wait for her to turn 16. For the last couple of years it seems that Tami and I have spent an increasing number of hours taking her places and picking her up. When her brother left for college last Fall it seemed to multiply. So from that point of view I'm glad she can now get in the car herself and drive to her destination and back home. On the other hand I'm sad that my little girl is no longer a little girl. Tami and I know from experience that once they get their drivers liscense everything changes. With more freedom and opportunity they need us less and less. As I said in my last blog I will miss taking her to school this coming Fall. I will even miss taking her to events and other things all across town. I will miss our conversations in the car and her "need" of me.

But while I will miss those things I'm thrilled at the young lady she is becoming. Tami and I are very proud that she is spending part of her Summer on a mission trip to Jamaica. She left last Sunday morning and was thrilled that she was "leaving the country without either of us," something even her big brother has never done! I know that she will love on the children there and be a great asset to the team.

When she gets back she will take her first "college class" this Summer. Hard to believe they can earn college credit before they even begin their Junior year in high school! This Fall she will be on the sidelines with the VARSITY Ryan Raiders cheerleaders! They told me it all happens too fast, I believe it now!

Happy birthday Alyssa. I love you and am proud of the Godly young lady you are becoming!

The Little Transitions of Life

For some 15 years now I have been doing the same thing every day of the school year. My job has always been to take my kids to school. It's been an event that I have thoroughly enjoyed for the last decade and a half. In the early years it was a time to talk and find out what they were anticipating for the day. As they grew older and became teenagers it was more a time of silence or listening to the radio. Neither of my kids are really "morning people" so the past few years they haven't been real big on conversation at 8:00 in the morning!

I can still remember the first time I dropped Ryan off at day care in China Spring, Texas. He was about three years old and up to that point in his life Tami had been a stay at home Mom, but I was going back to school to get my doctorate and she needed to work for "tuition" money. I cried all the way to the church that day! After I finished the degree Alyssa was born and Tami was again a stay at home Mom.

When Ryan began preschool in Pleasanton I took him to school. When he went to Kindergarten and First Grade in Pleasanton I took him to school. When we moved to Denton and he started second grade I took him to school. You get the point! Alyssa joined our trips when Ryan was in third grade and for a few years I took them together. Then Ryan moved on to Middle School and the trips were separate again. I took Ryan to Ryan High school for the last time in September of 2005 when he got his driver's license. But I have still been taking Alyssa since then.

For the past couple of years Alyssa and I would listen to WBAP on the way to school. She got to know the personalities on that station and we had some fun with that. But she sort of "grew out of that" last year and it has been KSCS or The Wolf since then. But one thing has never changed in 15 years at least for Alyssa. When we arrived at the school before she would get out of the car she would lean over to my side of the car for a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. Even at 15 she still did it!

I have known it was coming all year long. The last time I would take one of my kids to school. The last time we would ride together in silence or me asking questions and getting really short answers. The last time to listen to a favorite song together on the way. The last time for her to lean over for a quick hug and a kiss. I knew it was coming and this week it did. I took a kid to school for the last time! Alyssa will get her driver's license at the end of June and when school starts back in August she will drive herself to school.

In some ways I'm really sad. Its the end of an era, one of those little transitions in life that we all experience. I'm certainly excited to see my kids grow up and begin new things but I have to admit I'm going to miss those morning rides to school, the conversations, the songs on the radio, and most of all I'm going to miss the hugs and the kisses. But at least we still have her at home for two more years before the next little transition!

What would you do if you knew you had one month to live?

That is the question the people of First Baptist Church Denton are asking themselves every day for the next 30 days. If some how you knew that you only had one month to live how would you live your life? It's a very clarifying question and a question that most of us cannot answer on the spur of the moment. It takes some time to think through it and really come up with an answer that reflects how we feel and what is most important to us.

Unfortunately most people don't get that one month "warning" before they die. Instead death comes unexpectedly or suddenly to most. However the reason we are asking that question every day for 30 days is not because we expect to be dead in one month, quite the opposite we expect to live many more years on this earth. The reason we ask that question is we want to be "fully alive" for however many more days God gives us here on this earth.

If you think about it we don't really get to choose many things. We didn't get to choose who our parents are, we didn't' get to choose when we were born or where we were born. We certainly don't get to choose when we die. Most tombstones have two dates and a dash. The date of the person's birth and the date of their death, the dash in between represents the time they were alive here on this earth. The one thing we do have a say in is what we do with our dash. We get to decide how we will spend the time we have here on this earth. We can choose to waste our dash or we can choose to live it with passion and purpose. That is why we are asking that question for 30 days. Because if we begin to live like we were dying then we will really learn how to live.

If you knew you only had one month to live I bet you would want to spend time with family and friends. You would probably want to restore any relationships that were not what you wanted them to be. If you are a believer in Christ you would probably want to tell some of your closest friends how they can know Him as well. If you had one month to live you would probably want to do those things and more. So the question we need to answer is this: why don't we go ahead and do those things now? Why don't we live our lives like we only had one month left to live.

That's what we are going to be exploring for the next six weeks or so at First Baptist Church Denton. Go to www.fbcd.net to find out more about the One Month to Live challenge and how you can get involved and how you can begin to live life to the fullest with no regrets!